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drunk

The Maltese Diricawl (Neville/Luna, G)
Rating: G
Pairing(s): Neville/Luna
Summary: "A blonde walked into the room. A blonde to make a rabbi follow her into a pigsty."
Disclaimer: This is a work of fanfiction set in the Harry Potter universe—all recognisable characters and settings are the property of J. K. Rowling and her associates. No copyright infringement is intended. No profit is made from this work. Please observe your local laws with regards to the age-limit and content of this work.
Word Count: 100
Author's Notes: Warning: a bad pastiche of hard-boiled crime fiction follows. Adapted from my contribution to mctabby's 2007 Birthday HP Drabblethon, for the 2009 Thirty Days of Neville ficfest.


The shingle read "Neville Longbottom, Forensic Herbologist." This must be the place they had recommended. He knocked on the Hogsmeade cottage door.

———

As Longbottom was saying "I charge 4 Galleons a day, plus expenses," a blonde walked into the room. A blonde to make a rabbi follow her into a pigsty. She gazed at the visitor.

"Neville, are you aware that we have a badly disguised Heliopath in our house?"

———

Through the window they watched the man rush away. "Luna my sweet, I love you but please don't talk to the clients. At least not until they've signed a contract."